I regret having my son because I know his mother doesn’t love him

When I met my wife we were in our early 20’s and we were both of the opinion we didn’t want children. We got married and then when we were 27 she told me one day she was pregnant. I guess she forgot some days on the pill and got pregnant. I thought I was going to panic, feel dread or something but I didn’t. I just felt happy, my opinion completely changed and I realised the idea of being a dad sounded good to me. I am in a very good financial position, I could look after us. My wife ‘M’ works. But I didn’t want to pressure her into anything. I told her how I was feeling but ultimately told her whatever she wanted to do I would genuinely support her with. She is not a woman easily influenced by others, she’s the one influencing people so I knew my opinion wouldn’t sway her. She told me two days later she was keeping it. She was very casual being pregnant. Didn’t wear clothes to show off the bump, wouldn’t tell new people we met (usually when I had work events) she was pregnant unless it was glaringly obvious, she didn’t seem all that excited. I mean we talked about names, bought things together. I guess based off how my sister acted when she was pregnant or my other female friends she was more…chill. I didn’t think that was an issue though. When our son (Nikolai) was born she immediately told the nurses she didn’t want to touch him until he was fully cleaned up and not covered in all that shit newborns are. She seemed intrigued by him, looked after him but I wouldn’t say she gushed over him. She said she’d stay home for 6 months with him before she wanted to go back to work. (Not normal from where we’re from - London) At night she’d feed him but I’d get up to sit with him if he was just crying because she believed in the cry it out method and I didn’t. She just seemed very casual about having a baby. When her friends came over she’d talk to them about work, gossip, old friends. Didn’t mention much about Nikolai. I kept asking if she was okay, if she needed any help, maybe something postpartum? Offered to take on a lot of the responsibility if she was feeling overwhelmed. She said she was fine she just didn’t feel a need to gush. Nik’s almost 4 now and I just know M doesn’t love him the way a mother should and I don’t know what to do about it. She’ll do basic shit he needs. She will cook him food, wash him, bathe him. But she won’t play with him, she won’t ask about his day until he brings it up with her. If we go to the park on a weekend she’ll sit on the bench and watch me play with him, and come over and play when I ask her to. She’ll pick him up if he cries and just takes him away from what’s upsetting him. She speaks to him as if he’s an adult, which is fine, until he doesn’t understand what she’s saying. Our relationship is fine, she’s how she always has been. Times when we’re out without Nikolai are fucking amazing she’s the woman I have always loved. And I wonder what our life would have been like if we hadn’t had him. I love my son so much, seriously. But I feel bad for him. I can play with him as much as I want when I come home from work, I can read him as many bedtime story’s as he wants, engage with him as best I can but he knows his mum is different. It’s like he knows she’s…off. When he’s hurt he’ll run to her and when she just helps him rather than comfort him he’ll come crying to me. When we’re crossing the road he’ll look at her for a moment and then come to hold my hand. I’ve tried to talk to her, ask if she’s okay, needs help. She just says she’s fine and argues she does everything a mother should do. So yeah i regret having him in a way because I feel like it’s unfair he has a mother who…maybe wasn’t suited for it. Also fucking worried he’s going to grow up with issues