I lied on a resume two years ago and now I pay a guy online to do half my job.

Back in 2024 I was completely broke and desperate after being unemployed for almost eight months. I applied for a senior data analyst position at a mid-sized logistics firm. The role required deep expertise in custom SQL pipeline architectures and automated reporting frameworks that I frankly had zero experience with. My actual background was basic Excel and entry-level Python scripts. During the technical interview process I panicked and used a secondary screen with ChatGPT to pass the real-time coding prompts. I somehow landed the job with an 85k salary. The first two weeks were pure terror. I quickly realized I couldn't learn this stuff fast enough on my own without getting fired instantly. Out of sheer panic, I posted an anonymous gig on a forum looking for an offshore database engineer. I found a guy from Eastern Europe who agreed to work on call. We set up a system where I forward him my raw task tickets and internal requirements through an encrypted app. He writes the scripts, sets up the queries, and fixes my broken code. I pay him around $1,200 a month out of my paycheck. It has been over two years now. My manager thinks I am a silent genius who works fast and never complains. I even got a minor raise last fall. The worst part is I have almost zero understanding of the actual infrastructure I am supposed to be maintaining. If this guy ever decides to ghost me or demanding double the pay, my entire life will collapse overnight. Every single morning when I log in I feel this disgusting pit in my stomach, but the money is too good to stop.