After a recent divorce from deadbedroom marriage, I have received a lustful oral sex for the first time in 10 years; my eyes got watery, I cried.

For people not being used to phrase "deadbedroom" it is a marriage or relationship that sex happens very rarely or not at all. Like once a month or less. I have been married for 10 years. The typical thing, at first it was fine (sex 2-3 times a week) but it was super vanilla, and I thought it would get better with time. It got worse. My ex-wife was kind of person who enjoyed 1 position and only baby making type sex. Again it was fine at first, but after 2 years, it was down to like 2 times a month, and then once a month or less. In that time I have received 0 HJ or BJ, sorry to be graphic. She was and is a great person, but has the sexual depth of a puddle after a light drizzle. She outright did not like penis, I feel. After divorce is filed, I managed to hook up once before, but was also rather vanilla, although 1000x more steamy. Then last night, I hooked up again and received a lustful blowjob. I cried. I felt so much loved. So much wanted. I felt 15 years younger, like when I was with my ex-gf the one before wife, early 20s. I was full of life. Never thought I could cry from a BJ. I can not believe how important this was to me, and how unimportant it was to my ex-gf.