I (40M) will be informing my wife I’m filing for divorce

Some context. I (40M) have been with my wife (42F) since 2003. We have had ups and downs, good times and bad. Deaths, births, once in a lifetime memories, kids, a house and dreams. These all came shattering down, last year. I was SA’d last year by a fellow employee at our facility who was a supervisor. She started to treat me unkindly and belittle me to the point of hurting myself after it happened sending me threatening and demoralizing messages to hurt myself, no one loved me and that sure was happy I was raped as a kid, because before then she was a very nice lady and we worked together with no issues before. One day after work, she followed me in the parking lot talking about life and ambitions. Nothing crazy but I was giving cheerleader advice like “you got this” and “don’t let anyone take your eye off the prize” nothing leading or acted as if I wanted something from her. As she was taking her boots off in the parking lot. She grabbed my genitals and tried to make me put protection on while still holding me. I tried to back up even slightly from my pelvis and she squeezed harder. Nothing happened as she seen I wasn’t actively participating and wanting it she moved away and let me go. My problem? I didn’t tell anyone. Not even my wife because of how scared and insecure I was to tell her what really happened. And that me as a man locked up when someone forcibly grabbed me against my will. I’ve been SA as a kid and my wife barely found out last year after 21 years (at the time) because of the shame and guilt behind it. There were things she seen that were coping mechanisms after my rape that she thought were fantasy rather than trauma responses. So she assumed must have wanted something sexual, which made her second guess my responses when SA’d as an adult. This was something I never wanted in my life. I had loved and forgave myself and to prove to my wife so much that never wanted this, I went to our local court and placing a protective order against that lady after she left our job. She was served the documents a few months afterwards. Me holding onto these stigmas as if women won’t believe that we as men can be SA’d too. Taken advantage of when we are being nice. Hurt when we are just trying to help. And as man blamed right off the bat. I’m told I’m the one with the penis. I must have wanted that to happen. She wouldn’t have done it if I didn’t lead her on etc. have now placed a barrier that we cannot come over. She feels me keeping it from her was me hiding and wanting it. I never in 23 years have ever done something like that. This is why I have no trust in the outside world anymore. I help people and my kindness is taken for weakness which in turn hurts me. My wife and I had a conversation the other day and I told her that I cannot continue fighting over something I never wanted to happen. She said she can’t trust me and that things will never be the same. Another happen just a few minutes ago and she woke me up at 3 am knowing I have to work at 8 to tell me she doesn’t trust me and wanted to argue. I’m over it. So, as much as it pains me. On the 17th of August two days after my birthday I will give her the paperwork to set her free from me and all of this after 23 years together.