i've been lying about my mom for 11 years

when ppl ask about my parents i say my mom passed when i was 19. she didnt. shes alive, town two hours from here, havent spoken since 2014 it honestly started as an accident. girl in my dorm asked and i said "shes not around anymore" meaning shes not in my life, and the girls face did the thing, and i just. let her think it. it was SO much easier. no follow ups, no "have you tried reaching out," no one telling me family is family and then i did it again with someone else on purpose and its been 11 yrs and my husband thinks his mother in law is dead. hes said stuff like "i wish i couldve met her." he put her in the memorial part of our wedding program. i looked at that program and said nothing idk how to undo this. theres no version of that conversation where i come out the other side as someone he still fully knows